Has love ever been snatched away from you? Not because someone cheated nor because they got tired. But because life decided to play unfair. That’s *David’s story — one of grief, love, helplessness, and learning how to breathe through it all. In today’s issue of #LoveBox, he bares it all to Purple; what he considers the hardest times of his life – losing his partner to Stage 4 Mesothelioma.
First, I must empathise with you, David. No one should go through this. I imagine how hard it must have been.
Oh, yes, indeed. It was very hard. I still feel it on some days, if I am being honest. But yea, here we are. Thank you.
How long did you date for and how would you describe your relationship?
We dated for more than two years. It was pure bliss. She was perfect for me. Moyo* was a good woman, and I was very happy with her.
ICYMI Issue 9: We Broke Up To Focus On Growth. Now, I’m Unsure.
Did you ever think you two wouldn’t end up together?
Never. That thought didn’t even cross my mind. We were solid. We always thought we’d end up together. But the Universe had other plans.
When did she tell you about the illness? How did you react?
May 2016. I will never forget. She passed eight months after. She was at my place that weekend — we always had sleepovers, lol. I noticed she was moody but didn’t push. I knew she’d tell me when she was ready. When she finally told me, I was livid. Not at her. Just… shattered. It felt like something out of a movie. I was also angry she didn’t tell me earlier, but time was already running out. The last thing I wanted was to waste any of it fighting.
What were those eight months like for you?
Crazy. That’s the word I can find right now. I was sad most of the time, but I’d catch myself thinking: “If I’m this sad, how is she feeling?” So I tried to be strong, tried to hide it — but it was hard. How do you make peace with the fact that the person you love is leaving and you can’t stop it. Even worse, how did she live with the fact that she knew she was dying and at a particular time?
Did anything change in your relationship after the diagnosis?
Everything changed. I just wanted to make her happy. We spent a lot of time indoors because she was weak, but we made it count. Every single day broke me. I’d look at her and think, “There’s nothing I can do.” And I hated that feeling of helplessness.
ICYMI Issue 8: We Let Religion Win. Three Years Later, I Still Miss Her
Was there really nothing that could be done?
Nothing. We found out about the disease too late. The doctors said we should just let her live her last days in peace. Still, I spent most of my alone time researching, hoping, praying. But my hands were tied.
It’s been nine years. Have you moved on?
No, not really. It still feels like yesterday. It’s not something you just “move on” from. It’s like I lost a part of me in an accident, I finally decided to go for therapy in 2021 — I think it’s helping, but I don’t know if I’ll ever be the same.
Were you hoping for a miracle? Or had you accepted what was coming?
Both. A part of me was hoping for something miraculous, while another part was slowly accepting it. She held on to hope till the very end. One thing she was scared of was that I’d start blaming God for everything… I’m more at peace with God now, though.
ICYMI #LoveBox Issue 4: He Bought His Wedding Shoes from Me – Only To Marry Someone Else
Do you see yourself falling in love again?
I’m in a better place, but I’m not sure yet. If I love again, I want it to be genuine — not just me trying to fill a void. So I’m taking my time.
*Pseudonyms
KloutBox #LoveBox Series
This story is part of the KloutBox #LoveBox series, celebrating Valentine’s Day by sharing real stories about love, heartbreak, and everything in between. Subscribe to our newsletter here so you can be the first to know when we release the next issue in the series.
