There are different kinds of reactions people have when they see or encounter persons with disabilities. Although most individuals opt to mind their business, however, some do not, and they end up causing discomfort, which may or may not be their intention. When interacting with persons with disabilities do not emulate them.
The Sympathisers
This group of people have pity permanently etched into their faces. Their pouted lower lip, raised eyebrows, sombre eyes, exaggerated deep sighs and their chief weapon – eeyah! or pele. Persons with disabilities do not need pity and you don’t want to be that kind of person who constantly plays the role of sympathiser when interacting with them. They are not serving punishment, nor did they openly inform you that they are in some form of pain or discomfort. So, being all pitiful and sombre, trying to act like you understand and you feel bad for their circumstance, is a turn off and a red flag. Empathy, yes. Sympathy, No!
The Over-sabis
These people don’t understand body language, social cues, and they absolutely don’t know how to read the room. These are the people that push wheel chairs before the users can make sense of them. They assume the role of caregiver for the few minutes they spend with them. If a person with a disability does not ask for your help, don’t assume- ‘I too know’. If they have a caregiver, don’t take over their role because you cannot do a better job– they have more experience. If they need you, they will let youknow, so relax. Calm down. Don’t think you’re doing an act of kindness when, in fact, you are causing discomfort.
The “I’m inspired” people
These people get off on inspiration porn. When they see persons with disabilities, they think they have found Oprah Winfrey. They turn into motivational speakers, eulogising the fact that persons with disabilities can do what every human can. When they see them doing the barest minimum, they become fangirls, singing songs like “you are my inspiration”, “if you can do it, I can do it too” and on and on the aspire to be like Maguire goes. Getting in the face of persons with disabilities and praising them because of their circumstance is not the kind of person you want to be when interacting with persons with disabilities.
The Know-it-all
This set of people have watched every TikTok and YouTube videos and read every google searches on persons with disabilities and have therefore become experts in the field to the point that they begin to teach their grandmas how to suck eggs. They don’t shy away from educating persons with disabilities about their uniqueness. Maybe it is to seek approval or to show that they understand their condition, but it can be uncomfortable and awkward. Don’t be the kind of person that turns into a specialist or doctor, telling them what they need to do or not to do when you are interacting with them. They know. They also know that you know. Relax.
The on-lookers
These people are what Nigerians call looku-looku. Their unwavering gaze on persons with disabilities and their uniqueness are ever uncomfortable and disrespectful. They don’t do anything but stare and stare in a creepy way. You don’t want to be that kind of person. Of course, you can look at them, acknowledge them, and then look away, or if you want to talk to them, start a conversation. Don’t be a starer.
